Thursday
The SECOND Clinton/ Wallace interview


Wallace…Mr. President I would like to apologize for Sunday and move on. Forget the dot thing, let me just ask if you felt you did everything in your power to protect the American people while in office, one simple question, is that OK?

Clinton…I will be glad to answer all of your questions but first, what the hell happened to your old man?? Hell he looks like some Peruvian mummy they just dug out of a mud bank five miles out of Lima!

Wallace… Mr. President the question was…

Clinton… (Interrupting and pointing a finger) I know the question, but hold on a minute, YOU tell me why you won't just admit you are trying to get that vampire looking Colmes tossed so you can spoon with Hannity in prime..and another thing, why won't you admit it that you leaked that picture of Babs to DRUDGE?? Don't give me that smirk, you know the one with her in that black see through job and her cans flopping like half filled water balloons?

Wallace… Hold on now, I have asked you a simple question and you….

Clinton… (Standing and waving his chair over his head) Now buddy! YOU hold on, before I unload this 1300 dollar Herman Miller across your jaw, why don't you ask that same question to Hillary?? Don't you have the guts?

Wallace… (Jumping up and hiding behind a no neck floor producer) Mr. President, put the chair down! We will get her on the phone..No hold on I am being told she is on the phone now. Just calm down and I will be glad to ask her.

Clinton… (Dropping the chair and sitting back down) That’s better, Hilla, honey are you there?

Mrs. Clinton….Yes Bill I can hear you and I can answer. But first let me ask you, did you remember to roll the trash to the street this morning after I left for work?

Clinton…No let me ask you honey, which trash were you talking about the kitchen trash, the trash in the garage or the normal clutter in the rumpus room?

Mrs. Clinton… I am asking about the big trash, you know the one on wheels outside, did you roll it to the street this morning. Or did you just roll over and after you were sure I was gone, ask that little tramp of an upstairs maid to put on your old Hot Springs High School Band tunic and make HER roll it out? Simple question, just answer it please.

Mr. Clinton… (Standing and waving a finger at the camera) Listen to me AMERICA, I did NOT ASK THAT HOT HOOCHIE MAMMA TO ROLL THE TRASH TO THE STREET. (Kicking the 1300 dollar Herman Miller chair across the room and exiting but still with microphone on) WHO BOOKED ME ON THIS THING? GET THE CAR AND CALL CNN, I DON'T CARE IF BRITTANY JUST DROPPED ANOTHER ONE TELL THEM THEIR PRESIDENT WANTS AIR TIME AND WILL BE THERE IN FIFTEEN MINUTES, OH AND LEAK SOMETHING TO THE NEW YORK TIMES ABOUT THIS WALLACE PUNK HAVING A HAIR CUT JUST LIKE ALFRED E. NEWMAN'S!