Jan 30, 2009
ONE DOWN ONE TO GO!!!
NOW...Here is a nice list of YOU KNOW YOU LIVE IN
|TENNESSEE IF! Wish staff could take credit, but just like
the Knoxville News Sentinel we also MAKE UP or RIP OFF
what we print!
You've never met any celebrities....other than Fred Thompson.
"Vacation" means going to the family reunion.
You know all 4 seasons: Almost Summer, Summer, Still Summer and Christmas.
You laugh when people from anywhere north of TN tries to say or spell "y'all"
It's "Mar-vull" not "Mary-ville"
It's "Knox-vull" not "Knox-ville"
A tabogan is a hat, not a sled.
You butter your hot biscuit by cutting it open, putting a slab of butter inside and closing it back up again.
Every town in East Tennesse has a "strip" and they're not particularly safe to be in at night.
Pigeon Forge is not pronounced with a French accent.
Gatlinburg does have an "L" in it and it should be pronounced.
Sales tax is 9.75%.
You shop at Walmart for groceries, not at a grocery store.
You don't drive in Knoxville on game-day. EVER.
You or your friends chew.
You can't remember the last time you saw snow.
You have a "piss on" sticker on your car window.
You know when Elvis Presley Day is.
You know all of the words to "Rocky Top."
Even after all these years, you're still in love with Steve McNair.
You avoid going anywhere near Bristol Motor Speedway on race weekend!
You think it's worth it driving to Alabama just to save 1.25% on the sales tax!
You eat "dinner" at noon and "supper" in the evening.
Your Wal-Mart has specific parking spots for horse and buggies.
You use "commode" in conversations and absolutely no one knows what you're talking about.
You barely get snow days because there's hardly ever any snow. Better yet, you get snow days if your local weather stations predict even the slightest bit of snow!
You and everyone you know go to one vacation spot-Panama City!
You know how to do the watermelon crawl.
Everything is COKE, and if you don't like it, tough.
You're in a Carhartt jacket one day, shorts the next, and no one thinks anything about it.
Everyone you know owns a truck, and at least one of those trucks are just painted with primer, or more colors than the damn rainbow.
You measure distance in minutes, not miles.
You drive through a rich neighborhood and see the wannabe redneck kids with their brand new fords and their designer holy jeans and cowboy hats.
Boomsday in Knoxville is equal to New Year's Eve at Tiimes Square
Knoxville becomes the 3rd largest city on every Saturday in the fall.
Sweet tea is THE DRINK...no questions, no exceptions. Most people from Tennessee begin drinking sweet tea even before they can drink out of sippy cups.
You've ever had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.
You use "fixinto" like it's a real word. Example: "I'm fixinto go to the store"
All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, insect or animal.
You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked.
You know what a "DAWG" is.
You carry jumper cables in your car...for your OWN car.
You only own four spices: salt, pepper, Tabasco and ketchup.
The local papers cover national and international news on one page but require 6 pages for local gossip and sports.
You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday.
You find 100 degrees Fahrenheit "a little warm".
Fried catfish is "the other white meat"
You describe the first cool snap (below 70 degrees) as good pinto-bean weather.
You're convinced you don't need driver's ed-your father and uncles' pickup trucks in hay fields were training enough.
You wear shorts and a pullover in 40 degree weather.
You know there was no Civil War, but the War of Northern Aggresion.
You know that it's fork-a-deer river, not forked deer river.
All you think about is partyin at the creek..and yes its crEEk not crick...
Your high school schedule has or had ag (ffa) classes on almost every period except for lunch, and you skipped that to go to the ag cookouts.
Only TN would have a pizza place called "Possum's Pizza".... in Joelton. which has 3 syllables.
You can hold an hour-long conversation about the merits of the Hiwassee River versus the Ocoee River... including the traffic around each in the summer.
Your English teacher doesn't use proper grammar.
You know what ragweed is, and if you ate wild onions when you were a kid.
Your high school thinks "hunting" is a valid excuse for missing school.
You know three people related to Justin Timberlake.
You can play 9 holes at the country club in a wife beater, work boots, carhart shorts, piss drunk and no one thinks anything is wrong with it.
All there is to do on the weekend is go to a movie and then cruise around sonic or go to walmart, because they're the only two places open that late.
You and your friends throw parties at each others' houses every saturday during the fall to watch the game.
You graduated high school in the same building where cows are auctioned.
You'll be damned if you will buy bar-b-q sauce made in Kansas City.
You like the Vols, but hate Vol fans!!!
You have ever been snipe hunting or even if you know what snipe hunting is.
There is a Dairy Queen in every town with a population of 1000 or more.
You can drive down the road and wave at every single vehicle that you pass and at least 95% will wave back. 90% of the people you pass you know. Half of the ones that don’t wave back will flip you off.
You have a mayor named Willie.
You know who cooter brown is....or if you've even been drunker than cooter brown!
You know that what the rest of the world calls the Rebel Flag, is actually the Battle Flag of the Tennessee Confederate Army.
You know that the University of Memphis has a football team.
Snow days are unheard of. RAIN days, on the other hand, are quite frequent in middle tn
The majority of the people you know don't talk on a cell phone while driving down the road. instead they use cb radios.
You think it's perfectly normal to see trailers parked next to the Bristol Motor Speedway two weeks before the big race.
You've watched a baby possum eat out of the dog's food bowl, then woke up the entire family to show them.
You live to go to the Redneck Riviera.
Your pickup truck makes a monster truck look like a toy.
You know that taking Poplar Ave. will get you anywhere you need to go in the city of Memphis
Fred Smith is currently putting you through college...not your parents.
Nothing will ever compare to a Saturday in Neyland Stadium.
You have to convince your out-of-Tennessee friends that they REALLY DID have a World's Fair in Knoxville.
You know you're from tennessee when you say "lay in the floor" in stead of "lay on the floor."
It takes an act of God to get into your family's, boyfriend's, or best friend's truck. That's why God made cinderblocks!
You can't tell your scars from your bug bites.
You go fishin all the time and don't complain about the smell.
You actually know what a tater gun is and how to build and shoot one.
There are more cars in your front yard overgrown with grass then in a small dealership.
You have more fun at the local go kart track for 5 minutes than you do at Dollywood for the whole day.
You remember Opryland and riding your first roller coaster!
Your family considersfried chicken and mashed potatoes a huge deal, and they actually look forward to it.
You consider a "cool down" below 95 degrees.
You get out of school for NASCAR events, but not for Martin Luther King Jr. day.
You know that the difference between a fiddle and a violin is that the violin has "strings" and a fiddle has "strangs."
You learned the electric slide and how to square dance in your elementary school gym class.
You eat turnip greens for money and black eyed peas for good luck in the new year on Jan 1st of every year.
Your town has a barbecue festival.
Your police force is in federal penitentiary, half of the citizens got indicted on charges of cock fightin, and most of your friends and family are still makin good ol' shine.
You don't have to wear a watch because it doesn't matter what time it is. You work until you’re done or it's too dark to see.
Your favorite shirt is orange cause you can wear it to the game on Saturday, huntin' on Sunday, & to work for the highway dept. on Monday and you never have to change!
If you're late for school because you get stuck behind a tractor pulling hay or tobacco....and its excused everytime.
If you know that you can go 70 on Pellissippi when the speed limit is really only 55...the only people who go 55 are from out of state.
If you even know what Pellissippi is.
If you have a "Fair Day" where you can go to the county fair instead of school...and its excused.
If pinto beans and corn bread are included in EVERY meal.
If there are 20 or more people at every holiday, and they're all immediate family.
At family reunions half the family brings Fried Chicken, half the family brings Biscuits and Tater Salad, and the other half brings Sweet Tea.
You have 4 lawn mowers and you never know which one is gonna work.
If grillin with charcoal is the only way...gas grills are for yankee idiots who cant wait.
There's no need to throw the food out, give it to the dogs.
You order your meat BURNT, not well done.
You order Greens and Grits with everything.
You bleed VOL ORANGE!
You got your first shotgun on your seventh birthday.
At family reunions one part of the family brings Fried Chicken, another part brings the Biscuits and Tater Salad, and the other part brings Sweet Tea.
You say granma and granpa, without the "d."
You consider a visit to the Jack Daniel's Distillery to be a cultural experience (as opposed to say a museum). And, it's mandatory for every Tennessean to go at least
Posted by walker at Friday, January 30, 2009